I read that Michael Fassbender’s (above) acting in the sex-filled Shame is “fearless.” I’ve seen that adjective used to describe performances by actresses like Michelle Williams and Halle Berry. “Fearless” is critic-code for “He/She gets naked a lot in this movie.” Rooney Mara, no doubt, gives a fearless performance in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.
Irritating Codger of the Week: Tom Brokaw
Brokaw’s mush-mouthed, incomprehensible delivery made for painful viewing back when he was anchoring the news. Then he managed to alienate Baby Boomers and most everyone else with his “greatest generation” hogwash. (Apparently, widespread racism and sexism during the 1930s-’60s were just minor flaws, in Tom’s opinion.)
Now Brokaw is popping up on the talk-show circuit as some sort of “elder statesman.” Sorry, dude, but you ain’t Walter Cronkite — and you look ridiculous in that robe (above).
Here you go, Bush, this is your legacy:
Simon Cowell says that new America’s Got Talent judge Howard Stern is “not stupid,” and that Stern will have to curb his outrageousness for NBC’s family-friendly show. “If he goes too far, he’ll be kicked off,” Cowell says. Hmmm … a tame Howard Stern? Doesn’t that pretty much defeat the purpose of hiring him?
From E! Online: “We want to hang out with Charlize Theron, like, right now. Seriously, could she be any friggin’ cooler?” E! Online then uses a quote from actress Elizabeth Reaser to explain what makes Theron so friggin’ cool: “She [Theron] is also very potty-mouthed. Everyone else I know says ‘fuck’ and ‘shit’ every other word, but she is just so unabashedly herself.”
This reminds me of Entertainment Weekly’s recent love letter to Hollywood has-been Ellen Barkin (below), in which EW readers were informed that the profanity-loving actress is “our new Twitter obsession.” And why is that? Because “Anyone who reads Barkin’s profane, blunt, and hilarious Twitter feed knows that there’s definitely no filter on the 57-year-old actress and mother of two young adults.” And what, exactly, makes Barkin so funny on Twitter? She swears. A lot. I guess if you’re 57 and a mother, that’s considered hilarious.
Listen, I’m no puritan, but whoever said that people who swear a lot are compensating for a lack of imagination was onto something. Cursing, by itself, is not particularly funny. So go fuck yourselves, Charlize Theron and Ellen Barkin.
On the other hand, I would like to hang out with Theron, especially at the beach (below), although not because of her vocabulary.
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