Lots of nasty rumors about Tom Hanks floating around the Internet. I hope they are just that: rumors.

But this is 2024, so who knows?

 

We need to rip off the Band-Aid, find out who’s on the Epstein and Diddy lists, and get it over with.

 

**

 

 

With these pardons, Biden seems hellbent on cementing his legacy as one of the worst presidents in American history.

 

**

 

I’ve been watching a lot of horror movies lately.

Pretty Good:  Speak No Evil

Average:  Afraid

 

**

 

Look out, world. Guess who’s back on Twitter (X)?

 

 

 

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I haven’t seen Wicked the movie. Apparently, it’s pretty good. But I already have an issue with the film that has nothing to do with “wokeness” or the stars’ obnoxious press interviews.

Here’s my thing about musicals, in general: I like them — if the music is good. Rodgers and Hammerstein cranked out one great play/movie after another largely because their tunes were so memorable. Oklahoma!, The Sound of Music, My Fair Lady (not Rodgers and Hammerstein, but you get the point) — those 1940s-‘50s shows included tunes that I still enjoy.

I watched some Wicked videos on YouTube and there was nothing special that I heard. “Defying Gravity,” for example, spotlights what I dislike most about musicals: actors belting out some gaudy, generic number that doesn’t say “catchy tune,” but rather “Look at me! Listen to me! I’m singing!”

Theater kids may dig that shit, but it bores me.

 

**

 

 

The Helicopter Heist

 

This is one of those foreign shows (Sweden) that fly under the radar on Netflix, which is sometimes justified, sometimes a shame. The title sounds like a rip-off of Money Heist; the plot synopsis also seems “been there, done that.”

But damned if this miniseries didn’t hook me. I liked it for three main reasons: The lead characters were compelling; the plot had me alternately rooting for the bad guys and the good guys; the heist itself was magnificent. Oh, and I really dug the musical score.

 

**

 

Tier lists are all the rage on YouTube. I thought I’d make my own. It’s a subjective ranking of horror movies, from Universal classics to recent offerings. It’s how I feel about them. If you don’t like my rankings, tough titties. Click on the image for a larger view. If you still can’t read the titles in the images, it’s because Tiermaker sucks. Tough titties.

 

 

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by Kurt Vonnegut

 

“Your government does not exist and should not exist in order to keep you or anybody else, no matter what color, no matter what race, no matter what religion, from getting your damn fool feelings hurt.” — Kurt Vonnegut

 

In the quote above, from a speech Vonnegut delivered in 2000, the celebrated author is not hectoring a gathering of liberal “snowflakes.” He is defending his right to criticize … Thomas Jefferson.

Vonnegut is possibly my favorite writer because of his style. He makes a ponderable point, then confesses that his conclusion might be wrong. His humility and self-deprecation make you want to ponder that ponderable point.

The book is a collection of Vonnegut speeches from the 1970s to the early 2000s.  Vonnegut died in 2007. I miss his wit. And his ponderable points.

 

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There’s much gloating by MAGA over the results of the election, which is understandable.

The right is tickled pink** over America’s decision to spank the libtards and to “save democracy.” The left is in despair over its failed attempt to “save democracy.”

But the fun is over, or should be over, for the right. The media isn’t going to give Trump a honeymoon, and the left isn’t going away. The Dems have two months left to squeeze in as much (more) damage as possible.

Time to stop celebrating and get to work.

 

** My online editor informs me that “tickled pink” is an overused phrase. But is it? It used to be cliche, but I don’t hear it anymore. Time to bring back “tickled pink.” 

 

**

 

Heavy sigh. The Grouchy Editor website was attacked, again. This time, images were affected.

We are working to clean up old posts, but there’s a lot of work to do. Thank you for your patience, and for saving democracy.

 

**

 

 

Is there anything to this list, which is making the rounds on Twitter?

If so, it might explain quite a bit of the recent, suspicious behavior by our beloved celebrities.

 

**

 

We sometimes wonder if our site gets targeted for attacks because of our penchant for posting naked (or near-naked) ladies.

We won’t let that deter us. The girl below clearly wants everyone to enjoy her tits. Who are we to object?

 

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Who’s the Mole?

 

 

In his first term, Donald Trump appointed numerous people to high-level positions who wound up stabbing him in the back.

Odds are, at least one or two of his new appointments will work to undermine his agenda, again, in his second term.

But who will it be?

Who’s the mole?

 

**

 

Best Thing About the Election

 

It’s nice that Trump won, but to me there’s something better:

David beat Goliath.

Despite all odds, the “little people” took on Big Media, Big Pharmacy, movie stars, colleges, corporations, and global “elites” … and kicked their ass.

Democrats claim to be for “marginalized people,” but every institution in the country was against the Trump voters … and the institutions lost.

Big win for The Deplorables … and democracy.

 

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Voice of Shadows

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A critic’s dilemma:  When reviewing a low-budget movie from a first-time director, is it fair to hold the film to the same standard that you would for a more pedigreed production? Rookie filmmakers should be excused some missteps. On the other hand, the customer pays the same amount for Voice of Shadows as he pays for something from Steven Spielberg.

Pros:  For the most part, the movie looks and sounds professional, and most of the actors are fine. Director Nick Bain creates a suitably creepy atmosphere. The premise — three young people move into a house plagued by evil spirits summoned by an elderly woman — isn’t bad. Also, I liked Guillermo Blanco in the lead.

Cons:  The first two-thirds of the film are a slow burn. Slow burns can be good if the characters are intriguing. Unfortunately, the slowness in Voice is punctuated by a stream of tiresome horror-film clichés. Chairs rock themselves. Lights suddenly go out. Something bad is in the basement. An old book explains the evil spirits. The only thing missing is a cat jumping out of a closet.

Verdict:  Not a bad way to fill 90 minutes on a dark and stormy night. Just don’t expect anything groundbreaking. Release: 2023  Grade: C

 

Would I watch it again?  Not likely.

 

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Get ready for more of this. See below.

 

Post-election Musings

 

In the early 1960s, television went through a period when it was dominated by “hillbilly chic.” The most popular sitcoms were shows like The Beverly Hillbillies and Green Acres, fish-out-of-water comedies in which rural and urban cultures clashed.

The most important show of that ilk was The Andy Griffith Show. I don’t recall it as being overly religious; I do recall its message of the importance of strong community. (If there were few people of color on the show, it’s because that demographic reflected reality: there were few minorities in many small towns.)

I know this because I grew up in my own version of Mayberry, North Carolina: a small town in Minnesota. When I say small, I mean 1,300 residents — small. Not what you’d call cosmopolitan, but there was a strong sense of community.

After the 1960s, I did what so many young people did and moved to the big cities: Dallas-Ft. Worth for 20 years, then Minneapolis for 25 years.

I am currently reading a book of Kurt Vonnegut speeches, which he delivered in the 1970s. In the speeches, Vonnegut laments the lack of community and epidemic of loneliness in America — 50 years ago. Sounds similar to 2024, does it not?

One thing Vonnegut does not recommend to people seeking a replacement for old-fashioned community values: turning to government.

My unsolicited advice to young people on the left and the right: If you are unhappy with your life, consider moving to a smaller city. Not so small as Mayberry or where I grew up; that’s too small. But perhaps towns in the 10,000-50,000 range. You know, big enough to have some of the creature comforts we’ve grown accustomed to, but not so big that you can’t make friends.

 

**

 

Call me wicked, if you must, but this picture makes me smile:

 

 

**

 

If you’re old enough, you probably recognize the photo at the top of this post. It’s from the 1999-2000 saga of Elian Gonzalez, a Cuban boy at the center of an international custody dispute. After his mother drowned while transporting her boy to the United States, relatives fought to keep Elian in Florida while his father sought to have him returned to Cuba. The famous picture shown above was taken when INS agents stormed the house and seized young Elian, who was later returned to his father.

If Trump follows through on his promise to begin mass deportations, get ready to see a lot more pictures like this one. The media are salivating at the prospect.

 

**

 

 

grouchyeditor.com fema

 

And we are told that Trump is the intolerant fascist?

 

**

 

grouchyeditor.com bill maher

 

Bill Maher is making more and more sense these days.

 

**

 

grouchyeditor.com sexy wednesday

 

I’ve noticed this twice now, while I was watching YouTube promos for the upcoming season of Wednesday. At the very end (or beginning) of the video short, in an almost-subliminal, blink-and-you-miss-it moment, images of Jenna Ortega in sexy Wednesday mode appear on the screen.  What’s up with that? Are they deep fakes?

 

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by Mark Bauerlein

 

Today is November 5, 2024, election day, and the nation is holding its collective breath to find out who gets to run the country for the next four years (or more).

I suppose I read The Dumbest Generation Grows Up (dumb title) in part to gird myself, because the titular Millennials could well decide whether we get Kamala Harris or Donald Trump. If they do, Bauerlein’s pessimistic book doesn’t give me much hope for the future.

The book, a follow-up to Bauerlein’s 2008 survey of this age group (which I haven’t read), paints an unpleasant picture. Millennials, he writes, were coddled by Boomers and left to their own devices (literally and figuratively) by their mentors — specifically, college professors. The result is millions of young adults who scroll smartphones but know nothing about Shakespeare, Dickens, or Dostoevsky — all of them dead, white males, of course, and therefore unworthy of study.

Bauerlein contrasts this cohort of woke “utopians” with Malcolm X. The latter, he points out, had good reason to find fault with Western Civilization but, rather than simply dismiss it as evil, studied it so that he could make intelligent arguments.

Young people today don’t do that because it’s too difficult.

It’s possible we’ll learn tomorrow how the Millennials voted, and in what kind of numbers. God help all of us.

 

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We’re seeing lots of barely suppressed glee from conservatives in recent days, and it’s giving me deja vu. It worries me.

It’s too similar to the optimism on the right two years ago when we were told to expect a “big red wave” at the midterm elections. 

Yeah, that wave petered out, didn’t it?

 

**

 

 

 

Say what you will about Biden, he’s certainly going out with a bang. Or a bite.

 

**

 

Non-political stuff (movies & TV)

 

Left to right: male chauvinist pig, heroic female, serial killer

 

Woman of the Hour (above) — Director-star Anna Kendrick wanted to send a message about misogyny in America in her movie about a woman who meets a serial killer on The Dating Game (allegedly based on a “true” story). I watched and concluded that Kendrick sends her message about misogyny by making every male character in the film — including the “good” guys — evil, stupid, or weak.

In other words, Kendricks’s movie about misogyny is misandrist. Grade: C

 

Escape at Dannemora — This originally aired on Showtime some years ago, but it’s now on Netflix. The eight-part series about a prison escape in 2015 is mostly absorbing and suspenseful. But there are slow sections. It should have been six or seven parts. Grade: B+

 

*

 

 

Horror flicks are having a moment. Every month seems to mark the premiere of another critically acclaimed chiller (Heretic, The Substance, Strange Darling, to name a few). 

The problem for me is that I still feel burned by last year, in which a mediocrity called Talk to Me was widely praised as horror flick of the year. It wasn’t. And so, as they say, “Fool me once ….”

 

**

 

Last but not least, the video below is making the rounds on X. I can’t seem to take my eyes off this girl’s impressive … dive:

 

 

 

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I don’t know if Halperin is correct or not, but I’m guessing the aftermath of the election won’t be pretty, no matter which side wins. What I’m expecting:

 

  • We won’t know who won on November 6. We might not know for weeks to come. Or months.
  • There will be much emotion if we do find out early. Especially from Dems if they lose.
  • If you still don’t know who to vote for at this point, do us all a favor and just stay home.
  • If Trump prevails, count on the left to do what it can to ensure he’s not sworn in to office. Whatever it can.
  • My brother-in-law sells booze and pot. He’s looking forward to big sales following November 5.
  • MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

 

grouchyeditor.com debate Porky Pig

 

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