Monthly Archives: September 2014

Leo1

 

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Leo2

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Hey Leo, if you want me to reduce my carbon footprint, how about you stop leaving such a giant one, yourself?

 

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Lots of happy people this week.  The media are happy because just talking about war isn’t nearly as exciting as actually waging it.  The defense industry is happy because the big bucks will once again roll in.  Conservatives are happy because Obama finally grasped the fact that he was elected, twice, not to do the bidding of the people who voted for him, but to do the bidding of the people who voted against him.

Amazing how quickly we all stopped asking, “Should we bomb in Syria?” and leaped to “Who wants to join us?”  Congress is home taking a nap, the media has a war woody, and the populace is afraid it will get its head chopped off while sleeping in bed.

 

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Linder

 

I finally figured out the meaning behind the title of the FX series, The Bridge.  Apparently, several characters have severe dental issues and must wear a bridge.  I realized this when I noticed that Hank never moves his lips when he speaks, and neither does Mumble Mouth Linder (above), who is more incomprehensible than a drunken Tom Brokaw.

I am upset with FX because the network provides subtitles for all of the show’s Spanish speakers, but none for Hank and none for Mumble Mouth Linder.

 

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AP

 

The clowns who populate cable news have been aflutter, agog, and atwitter over Adrian Peterson and the issue of corporal punishment.  But you have to go online to find stories about what is, to me, the bigger issue:  this propensity of pampered jocks to create fatherless families.

 

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Watching Jimmy Fallon this week was like traveling back in time to 1966.  Barbra Streisand belting out tunes, Jerry Lewis cracking jokes, Questlove sporting an Afro ….

 

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I want to work for CNN.  On CNN, you can get a job like Anthony Bourdain and Mike Rowe have which, from what I can tell, entails traveling around the globe, eating food, and chatting with locals.  For that, you are paid handsomely.  I can do that.

 

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All Is Lost

Lost

 

Robert Redford plays a yachtsman who struggles for eight days to survive in the Indian Ocean after his boat is punctured by floating junk.  Redford was praised for his solo performance in this harrowing tale, and deservedly so, but All Is Lost is really a director’s movie … and a sound engineer’s movie, and an editor’s movie, and a cinematographer’s movie, et al.  It’s a fine showcase for what only Hollywood can do:  dazzle us with sight and sound.  Release:  2013   Grade:  B+

 

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Il Futuro

Future

 

This is one of those artsy, low-plot foreign movies that suck you in because the characters are interesting and the images are striking.  Sad-eyed Manuela Martelli plays an orphaned teen who, along with her younger brother and his shady pals, concocts a plot to rob an aging blind man (Rutger Hauer).  The ensuing romance between old man Hauer and waif-like Martelli manages to be simultaneously creepy and erotic.   Release:  2013  Grade:  B-

 

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Wake in Fright

Wake

 

“He was a good guy.  But then he fell in with a bad crowd.”  John Grant (Gary Bond) is a good guy, a schoolteacher toiling in the boonies of Australia’s Outback.  He goes on holiday, has a drink, does a little gambling … and then meets the menfolk of a community known as “The Yabba.”  What follows is a harrowing, graphic look at just how low the human spirit can fall – disturbing stuff, but expertly realized by filmmaker Ted Kotcheff.  Release:  1971  Grade:  B+

 

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Reality TV Week!

 

Utopia

Fox premiered a new reality show called Utopia.  A bunch of exhibitionist gluttons for punishment volunteered to spend a year at a ranch equipped with scores of TV cameras, and viewers are invited to watch the proceedings, 24 hours a day.  And what kind of goodness awaits viewers of the live stream?  This kind of goodness:

 

 

[Editor’s note: Apparently someone at Fox or Dailymotion decided that this video should be cancelled, just like the low-rated show it sprang from. But fear not: Below are screen captures from Utopia’s short-lived run, all but the first of them featuring the fetching Dr. Nikki Noce, who looks ready for her exam. – January 2016]

 

.                 grouchyeditor.com Utopia  grouchyeditor.com Nikki Noce  grouchyeditor.com Nikki Noce

.                 grouchyeditor.com Nikki Noce  grouchyeditor.com Nikki Noce  grouchyeditor.com Nikki Noce

.                 grouchyeditor.com Nikki Noce  grouchyeditor.com Nikki Noce  grouchyeditor.com Nikki Noce

(Click on pictures for larger views.)

 

Big Brother

Houseguests on CBS’s Big Brother spend a lot of time fantasizing about their post-show popularity with fans, particularly on social media sites.  So imagine their surprise last week when they overheard the audience reception given to booted contestant Christine, who was greeted with a chorus of loud boos.  No, you don’t have to imagine their surprise; here’s a picture:

 

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Wedding1

 

Wedding2

 

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This guy never, ever, has any good news:

 

Hawking

 

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MORE CELEBRITY

 

NUDES LEAKED!

(Click on the images for full nudes) *

 

 

Palin                   Moore2

                    Sarah Palin                                                    Michael Moore

 

  Gabbard                       Blitzer

              Tulsi Gabbard                                              Wolf Blitzer

 

  Rickles                      Arianna

                Don Rickles                                                      Arianna Huffington

 

*  If you click on the images and do not see full nudes, this can mean either a) your computer has been hacked and is no longer functioning, so you might as well just toss it into the trash; or b) we have too much time on our hands and thought this would be a fun prank.

 

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Farm

 

We realized that the hacked celebrity nudes were a big deal when we saw that Farm Weekly was all over the story.  Farm Weekly?

 

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