Something wrong in the head with this woman. She keeps laughing at inappropriate moments, and her giggle/cackle is the most disturbing I’ve heard since, well, Hillary.

 

**

 

I rushed through the first five seasons of Peaky Blinders so that I would be all caught up in time for the sixth and final season on Netflix. Then I read that season six recently wrapped shooting and will be in editing for at least six more months.

What the hell am I supposed to do for the next six months?

 

**

 

I, too, used to laugh at so-called “conspiracy theories.” Not anymore. Not this year.

My apologies to all of those old post-apocalyptic, dystopian, and/or science-fiction shows that I used to chuckle at. Because just about anything seems possible these days. The world has gone nuts.

As an example of what I’m talking about, here’s a partial list of once-venerable U.S. institutions I used to (sort of) trust: the ACLU, the Supreme Court, pharmaceutical companies, sports teams, schools, movies, television, Coca Cola, Tom Hanks, and (sigh) the news.

OK, well I haven’t really trusted the news in quite some time, but now it’s beyond ridiculous.

If the Davos elites or the space aliens or Nancy Pelosi or A.O.C. are behind this “great reset,” they are doing a mighty fine job of messing up America. So fine, in fact, that I don’t see how they can possibly put it back together again — socialist or not.

 

And what is the deal with this upcoming UFO report, which seems to be eliciting a collective yawn from the world?

 

**

 

 

The girl pictured above apparently upset her TikTok applecart by a) professing a love for Bernie Sanders and his socialist agenda, but then b) making a video that shows off her new, non-socialist, very expensive apartment.

I had never heard of her — Wikipedia describes Nicole Sanchez as “a Twitch streamer and TikTok personality” — and I don’t really give a rat’s ass about what she does or says. But it was an opportunity to run this picture of her in a bikini. So here you go:

 

(I’ve been fooled before by the Internet, so if it turns out that the girl pictured above is not, in fact, the girl I am writing about, well … you really shouldn’t be looking at it, anyway.)

 

**

 

 

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The Dunderhead

 

When you’re betrayed by someone who already has the scent of a scoundrel, well, what did you expect? But when you are betrayed by Marcus Welby (look it up, kids), it stings.

Here is what I wrote about Anthony Fauci in March 2020:

 

 

On the other hand, this is what I wrote about Fauci when I first saw him on TV in August 2014:

 

 

Certain idioms come to mind: Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. Trust your first impression.

I, like most people, was willing to give the benefit of the doubt to the scientists, doctors, and even politicians dealing with the COVID outbreak a year ago. I thought the virus was a complete surprise to just about everyone — with the glaring exception of China — and that all of us were justifiably scrambling.

That benefit of the doubt certainly extended to Fauci, who was made for TV and whom I once praised. But now it appears that Fauci knew a lot about the origins of this virus and chose to lie about it. And to bask in the glow of a fawning media.

Fauci is almost certainly responsible in part for millions of deaths. And yet the leftist media continues to kiss his wrinkled ass.

The “good doctor” probably belongs in prison. Or we could turn him over to the relatives of COVID victims and let them do what they please with him.

And Brad Pitt, wherever he’s hiding, needs to issue an apology.

 

**

 

Author Shelby Steele Thursday night on Fox: Critical Race Theory advocates seek to “capture white guilt” and are making this demand: “Give things to blacks.” 

Problem is, in practice that means the middle class is expected to “give things to blacks.” Certainly not the elite or the upper class.

That’s a diversion and a good recipe for what Charlie Manson (below) allegedly pined for: race war.

 

 

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The Mule

 

In the crotchety-old-man phase of Clint Eastwood’s long career, I prefer his 2008 drama Gran Torino. But The Mule, directed by Eastwood in 2018, is very much a “Clint Eastwood movie.” That means I’m on board.

Eastwood’s Earl Stone is an elderly ne’er-do-well who stumbles into a new career as a “mule” for a Mexican drug cartel. Earl capitalizes on his harmless appearance to transport cocaine and other bad things from state to state.  The question is, how long will his luck hold out?

If you prefer a goofy, affable Eastwood to a cantankerous, retired Dirty Harry — the Eastwood we got in Gran Torino — then Mule may appeal to you more than it did to me.  Release: 2018  Grade: B-

 

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Who’s Full of It Now?

 

Let’s do an accounting:

 

Donald Trump said it was quite possible that the “Wuhan Virus” came from a lab in China, rather than from some bat in a wet market, or wherever.

His detractors said “hogwash!”

Looks like Trump was right.

 

Trump said a wall would work on the Mexican border.

His detractors cried “hogwash!”

Joe Biden is now thinking about continuing the wall. Looks like Trump was right.

 

Trump said the Russian scandal was a hoax.

His detractors yelled “hogwash!”

Five years later, the only president who seems to be in bed with Russia (and China) is Biden.

Looks like Trump was … well, you know the drill.

 

**

 

Thank goodness we have Twitter, Facebook, and Google all censoring conservative views about the border crisis, the virus, and Russia/China, or we’d be in danger of learning the truth.

 

**

 

 

I’m thinking what we need is a “Gutless Sellout Hall of Fame,” composed of famous Americans who betray their own country in pursuit of Chinese cash.

Let’s start one. Here are two nominees for the inaugural class:

 

.                   

 

Newest nominee for the “Gutless Sellout Hall of Fame”? This bonehead:

 

 

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Better Late Than Never, or …

Too Little Too Late?

 

 

Biological weapons are scary. Who’s to say that COVID-19 isn’t just the first in a long string of viruses about to be unleashed on the world?

I certainly no longer believe anything the clownish Dr. Fauci has to say. He’s much too busy planning the Hollywood story of his life. Starring, of course, Brad Pitt. I can’t wait for the scene where Fauci lies to Congress about the U.S. funding the Wuhan lab.

 

So, yeah, China is the villain in this drama — along with our own money-grubbing elites.

 

*

 

 

This organization is targeting “woke” corporations and naming names in an attempt to shame the shadowy honchos who hide behind beloved institutions like Coca Cola or Disney. That’s a good idea.

Rather than getting angry at an amorphous, untouchable corporation, go after the cowardly villains at the top. After all, aren’t we told that “corporations are people”?

 

*

 

Seems like we are rapidly transforming from a “nation of laws” to a “nation of rules.”

Unlike laws, rules can carry the weight of law without the burden of being constitutional.

Meanwhile, actual laws can simply be ignored. Just follow the rules, pal — or else.

Thanks, Millennials.

 

**

 

 

I don’t know why these scandals still come as (a little bit of) a shock to me. You’d think that by now, after reading books about celebrities like Johnny Carson and gossip sites like Crazy Days and Nights, I’d know better than to believe the Hollywood P.R. machine.

Now it’s Lucy’s turn to face the ugly music. Good grief.

 

 

**

 

 

This Netflix movie from Austria is getting lukewarm reviews, but silly me, I kind of liked it. The Strange House is not particularly scary, but then it isn’t supposed to be. It’s a spooky little flick aimed at the whole family.

It’s like Stranger Things was in its first season: mildly ominous, but with a big heart.

 

The Strange House isn’t getting a whole lot of buzz. Army of the Dead, on the other hand, is getting tons of buzz.

I watched it yesterday. It was … OK. By that I mean it’s entertaining mayhem, but nothing you haven’t seen a hundred times before.

 

**

 

 

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by Neil Gaiman

 

Fantasy, or “magical realism” when the story is aimed at adults, is not my favorite literary genre. For instance, I was unmoved by Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s much-praised, magical-realism-infused One Hundred Years of Solitude. But there are exceptions to my rule.

I find that if I like this kind of stuff, it’s usually because the tale is told from a child’s point of view (or an adult recalling his or her childhood). That’s what I liked about the Harry Potter books, or Ray Bradbury’s Something Wicked This Way Comes.

Gaiman’s short novel is a mashup of childhood nostalgia (To Kill a Mockingbird comes to mind) and terrors triggered by something out-of-this-world (as in Something Wicked). Ocean’s narrator, now middle-aged, recalls his 7-year-old self encountering a trio of magical female neighbors. The women help him fend off all manner of demons, both fantastic and all-too-real.

Perhaps I’m just an unimaginative, jaded adult, but I enjoyed the book for its circa 1960s nostalgia. Not so much for its magical mumbo jumbo.

 

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I am mystified as to why Netflix often has the Midas touch when it comes to producing original TV shows, while at the same time it cranks out so many Lifetime network-level original movies.

The same streaming service that gives us, for example, the superb Ozark, this past week premiered Oxygen and the Amy Adams vehicle The Woman in the Window.

Oxygen, from France, wasn’t exactly “bad,” and it does feature one truly memorable sequence when the heroine discovers what actually happened to her immediate environment (she’s confined to a claustrophobic pod). But I’m guessing I won’t remember much about the movie six months from now.

Window won’t make anyone forget its most obvious inspiration, Alfred Hitchcock’s Rear Window. The much-anticipated thriller boasts an impressive A-list cast, with Gary Oldman, Jennifer Jason Leigh, and Julianne Moore lending support to Adams, who plays an agoraphobic who apparently witnesses a murder across the street. It is also apparent that Netflix, or some other entity, spent a bundle on the production itself.

But the story? Nah. Watch Rear Window again, instead. Or Ozark.

 

Top, Jimmy Stewart in Rear Window. Bottom, Amy Adams in The Woman in the Window.

 

**

 

 

I guess I feel about Joe Biden the way so many lefties felt about Donald Trump. I can only observe the guy for a limited period of time while the country falls apart. Then I turn to Netflix.

 

**

 

 

Evidently, proofreading skills — or writing skills, or editing skills — are no longer a requirement to write headlines for most Web sites. If anyone can please explain the meaning of the Little Fish headline above, I will send you a free copy of The Woman in the Window.

 

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Sex scandals, treason, and too many crimes and misdemeanors to count.

Judging by the corrupt people who run this country, I’m beginning to wonder if certain Middle East countries might be right. Has America become “The Great Satan”? Our leaders seem to behave that way.

Heavy sigh.

Screw politics. Let’s talk about TV.

 

**

 

 

I was into Netflix’s adaptations of Harlan Coben novels, including The Stranger, Safe, and The Woods. I’m not so keen on the latest Coben offering, The Innocent, produced in Spain. Each episode is told from the point of view of a different character, which is a change of pace but not necessarily a welcome one.

Coben’s stories are so twisty and convoluted that they work best when we have just one or two protagonists to follow as the plot unfolds. Focusing on a new character for each of eight hours is simply too much.

On the other hand, if you dig Spanish ass, this is a show for you. Can you say, “strip-club scenes”? Can you say, “many strip-club scenes”? Pretty much every female lead appears in at least one pole-dancing routine. A sampling:

 

Asia Ortega (above and below)

 

 

Juana Acosta

 

Aura Garrido

 

*

 

 

Peaky Blinders: OK, so I’m a bit late (eight years late, to be exact) to this British period drama.

Methinks the show might have been overshadowed during its initial run by contemporary series like Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad, et al. But it’s very well done. And how come the Brits have so many superb actors?

 

**

 

 

I take back what I said about America possibly being The Great Satan. That distinction clearly belongs to China — along with the Western companies that do business with it.

 

**

 

 

**

 

One more picture of The Innocent star Aura Garrido, not because it’s from The Innocent (it’s not), but because we like it:

 

 

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Dear Republicans:

Never underestimate the power of a politician buying voters.

It doesn’t really matter if Joe Biden’s policies will bankrupt the country, or if his crew is hellbent on erasing patriotism, culture, and the middle-class way of life.

As long as we get $1,400 checks, “free” daycare for our infants and/or a “free” college education, whoever’s handing out the cash will get elected. And re-elected.

Also, the more the rich squawk, rightly or wrongly, about higher taxes, the more popular the tax will be.

 

**

 

 

I don’t understand how TV critics can review new shows based on just a handful of episodes, which is something they routinely do. Isn’t that like watching 15 minutes of a 2-hour movie, and then turning in your verdict?

Granted, critics can’t wait for something like Gunsmoke, which ran for 20 seasons, to conclude before gracing us with their opinions. But viewing something like, oh, maybe half a season before you begin typing might be nice.

Having said that, I watched the first two episodes of Mare of Easttown and I recommend it.

 

Hey, I would have watched more, but two episodes were all they offered during HBO’s freebie week and I didn’t want to subscribe.

 

**

 

Carlsons

 

Frank Luntz

 

Why I dig Tucker Carlson: He has the balls to go after sacred cows that everyone else leaves alone — like Friday night when he tore pollster Frank Luntz a new one. I, for one, had no idea that Luntz is, in reality, a corporate shill with Democrat leanings.

I’d watch Tucker’s new show on Fox Nation, but I don’t want to pay for the subscription.

 

*

 

 

Fellow Minnesotan Kelly Carlson was interviewed on Fox News the other day — I’m not entirely sure why; I guess she’s now a proud housewife or something — and it occurred to me that I haven’t seen her in anything since I was a regular viewer of Nip/Tuck.

I remember thinking that it was too bad she didn’t do any nude scenes. Silly me. She certainly did do nude scenes, like this one from Starship Troopers 2:

 

 

**

 

 

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by Stuart Turton

 

I can only imagine the time and effort that went into the crafting of this story, in which the hero finds himself charged with solving a murder but with a bizarre handicap: Every time he wakes up, he’s inhabiting a new body, and this new person is also charged with solving and/or preventing death at an old English mansion.

The plot involves too many characters to remember, endless time shifts, and the ever-problematic concept of time travel. Oh, and there is also the body swapping. I get weary just trying to describe it.

I do admire Turton’s self-imposed challenge and his ability, I guess, to successfully weave such an intricate web. But was all that trouble worth it, from a reader’s perspective?

Well, yes and no. Early on, I had to decide whether the book was time-consuming piffle, or if I should just go with the flow. I am predisposed to enjoy murder mysteries, so I chose the latter. There are entertaining, action-packed sequences. But because of that labyrinthine, head-scratching plot, reading the novel was often more chore than fun.

 

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