It’s the new Fall Season on network TV! I couldn’t bear the thought of missing out on any of the excitement, so I tuned in to four of America’s most popular shows. This is what I learned:
Two and a Half Men is painfully, embarrassingly bad television. I’m guessing that it sucked when Charlie Sheen was the star (I didn’t watch), but it couldn’t possibly have been worse than the uninspired drivel with Ashton Kutcher.
Dancing with the Stars was equally dreary. I did learn why viewers never get to see Nancy Grace below the waist on her HLN show. Can you say “chubby”?
The mass appeal of Modern Family escapes me. The “shaky cam” is annoying, the political correctness is heavy-handed, and I almost — not quite, but almost — wished there was canned laughter, if only to remind me that the show is supposed to be funny. Ed O’Neill, so memorable on Married … with Children, is wasted here.
Simon Cowell — I am sick of this guy. His grumpy shtick was amusing years ago, but I am tired of watching the famous Cowell scowl. The X Factor versus American Idol? They are the same show.
Summary: I must be completely out of touch with the American viewing public. The public is addicted to junk. On the other hand, I am hooked on Survivor.
“If the thing happens to come down in a city, that would be bad.” — Harvard astrophysicist Jonathan McDowell, reassuring none of us about the falling space satellite which, according to the image shown above, might have tumbled down in my neck of the woods ….
Feminist of the Week: Mike Tyson
This is what Tyson had to say last week, talking about Sarah Palin on an ESPN station:
“You want her to be with somebody like [Dennis] Rodman …. You want someone like Rodman — yeah baby! Let’s get that donkey in here now. Just imagine Palin with a big old black stallion ripping. Yeehaw!” And later: “She could always get boned out by a black person, a vote to bang her.”
And more: “Everybody got to get that out of their system when they get out of college. If you’re a black man, every white girl, every uppity middle-class … everybody got to get their share of love.” Believe it or not, I’ve omitted some of Tyson’s more colorful comments.
Then why don’t you quit Fox and work somewhere else for free? I’m sure Paul Ryan would support that:
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