Ricky Gervais liked my reply to his post:

 

 

It’s nice to be recognized by a comic genius.

 

 

Twice.

 

**

 

Quiet Before the Storm

 

Twas the week before Christmas

and all through the land,

Redsters and Bluesters

were taking a stand …

Before all hell breaks loose

 

Enjoy the holidays, because next year could make 2024 feel like a bridge tournament.

The election was merely a battle; the war begins next month, methinks.

 

**

 

Season two of Wednesday will premiere sometime next year. I did a search for information and this photo popped up:

 

 

Turns out there is a whole industry dedicated to deep-faking our favorite movies and TV shows. For example, I’ve seen Crocodile Dundee and Alien, but I don’t recall these two scenes:

 

 

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Conclave

 

Story: When the pope dies, cardinals are sequestered in Vatican City to elect a new one. The man in charge of this process (Ralph Fiennes) must navigate competing factions and secrets kept by the deceased pope.

 

Pros:

A.  It’s refreshing to watch an intellectual drama, as opposed to an emotional drama or, God help us, another comic-book flick or sequel.

There are scenes in Conclave that might appear dull on paper but are gripping on the screen. It’s why I love good chess movies like The Queen’s Gambit and Searching for Bobby Fischer. You don’t need chase scenes or explosions to generate suspense. Conclave uses great acting to convey a dramatic power struggle.

B.  The sets look gorgeous. The atmosphere is suitably claustrophobic.

C.  It’s educational for non-Catholics. Aside from the famous smoke signal when a new pope is elected, I knew nothing of the selection process.

 

Cons:

A.  The ending.

I am not referring to the big twist, which has been criticized as being “woke.” I thought the twist was more thought-provoking than virtue signaling. What I disliked was the scene preceding the big reveal, in which the conclave of cardinals, having listened to a stirring speech by a colleague, make a major, about-face decision about their vote. I didn’t buy it.

Release: 2024  Grade: B+

 

Would I watch it again? If I get thirsty for a brainy thriller, yes.

 

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by Gypsy Rose Lee

 

I was in the mood for a curiosity, so I read Mother Finds a Body, by Gypsy Rose Lee. What and Who? you might ask.

Lee was America’s most famous burlesque-and-striptease star of the mid-20th century. She penned a memoir titled Gypsy, which became a musical play and a 1962 movie with Natalie Wood and Rosalind Russell. Oh, and she wrote two murder mysteries, including this one.

I consider murder-mystery novels written by famous strippers to be a “curiosity.”

The plot:  A handful of comics and dancers traveling east with a trailer make a pit stop in Ysleta, Texas, and discover a body under the bed in their mobile home.

If you’ve watched any screwball comedies from the 1930s, what ensues is very much like those. Lots of tough talk, quaint jargon, and quirky characters.

Like one of Lee’s costumes during her act, there’s not a lot of material here — but it’s an enjoyable watch.

 

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This guy Kirby is a great government spokesman for the mysterious-drones issue.

I am being sarcastic.

I mean, at this point does anyone believe a single word out of his mouth?

 

**

 

If I had to cite a movie that these bizarre drone sightings remind me of, I’d say Netflix’s Leave the World Behind.

That movie was produced by the Obamas.

Just a coincidence?

(Cue Twilight Zone music.)

 

**

 

I recently got back on Twitter and was quickly bombarded by two types of followers: AI-generated attractive “girls,” and real-life hookers.

Occasionally one of these chicks has an amusing post. Like this one:

 

 

Overall, I am happy to be back on the X:

 

 

As for the people I reply to, I couldn’t say.

 

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Lots of nasty rumors about Tom Hanks floating around the Internet. I hope they are just that: rumors.

But this is 2024, so who knows?

 

We need to rip off the Band-Aid, find out who’s on the Epstein and Diddy lists, and get it over with.

 

**

 

 

With these pardons, Biden seems hellbent on cementing his legacy as one of the worst presidents in American history.

 

**

 

I’ve been watching a lot of horror movies lately.

Pretty Good:  Speak No Evil

Average:  Afraid

 

**

 

Look out, world. Guess who’s back on Twitter (X)?

 

 

 

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I haven’t seen Wicked the movie. Apparently, it’s pretty good. But I already have an issue with the film that has nothing to do with “wokeness” or the stars’ obnoxious press interviews.

Here’s my thing about musicals, in general: I like them — if the music is good. Rodgers and Hammerstein cranked out one great play/movie after another largely because their tunes were so memorable. Oklahoma!, The Sound of Music, My Fair Lady (not Rodgers and Hammerstein, but you get the point) — those 1940s-‘50s shows included tunes that I still enjoy.

I watched some Wicked videos on YouTube and there was nothing special that I heard. “Defying Gravity,” for example, spotlights what I dislike most about musicals: actors belting out some gaudy, generic number that doesn’t say “catchy tune,” but rather “Look at me! Listen to me! I’m singing!”

Theater kids may dig that shit, but it bores me.

 

**

 

 

The Helicopter Heist

 

This is one of those foreign shows (Sweden) that fly under the radar on Netflix, which is sometimes justified, sometimes a shame. The title sounds like a rip-off of Money Heist; the plot synopsis also seems “been there, done that.”

But damned if this miniseries didn’t hook me. I liked it for three main reasons: The lead characters were compelling; the plot had me alternately rooting for the bad guys and the good guys; the heist itself was magnificent. Oh, and I really dug the musical score.

 

**

 

Tier lists are all the rage on YouTube. I thought I’d make my own. It’s a subjective ranking of horror movies, from Universal classics to recent offerings. It’s how I feel about them. If you don’t like my rankings, tough titties. Click on the image for a larger view. If you still can’t read the titles in the images, it’s because Tiermaker sucks. Tough titties.

 

 

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by Kurt Vonnegut

 

“Your government does not exist and should not exist in order to keep you or anybody else, no matter what color, no matter what race, no matter what religion, from getting your damn fool feelings hurt.” — Kurt Vonnegut

 

In the quote above, from a speech Vonnegut delivered in 2000, the celebrated author is not hectoring a gathering of liberal “snowflakes.” He is defending his right to criticize … Thomas Jefferson.

Vonnegut is possibly my favorite writer because of his style. He makes a ponderable point, then confesses that his conclusion might be wrong. His humility and self-deprecation make you want to ponder that ponderable point.

The book is a collection of Vonnegut speeches from the 1970s to the early 2000s.  Vonnegut died in 2007. I miss his wit. And his ponderable points.

 

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There’s much gloating by MAGA over the results of the election, which is understandable.

The right is tickled pink** over America’s decision to spank the libtards and to “save democracy.” The left is in despair over its failed attempt to “save democracy.”

But the fun is over, or should be over, for the right. The media isn’t going to give Trump a honeymoon, and the left isn’t going away. The Dems have two months left to squeeze in as much (more) damage as possible.

Time to stop celebrating and get to work.

 

** My online editor informs me that “tickled pink” is an overused phrase. But is it? It used to be cliche, but I don’t hear it anymore. Time to bring back “tickled pink.” 

 

**

 

Heavy sigh. The Grouchy Editor website was attacked, again. This time, images were affected.

We are working to clean up old posts, but there’s a lot of work to do. Thank you for your patience, and for saving democracy.

 

**

 

 

Is there anything to this list, which is making the rounds on Twitter?

If so, it might explain quite a bit of the recent, suspicious behavior by our beloved celebrities.

 

**

 

We sometimes wonder if our site gets targeted for attacks because of our penchant for posting naked (or near-naked) ladies.

We won’t let that deter us. The girl below clearly wants everyone to enjoy her tits. Who are we to object?

 

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Who’s the Mole?

 

 

In his first term, Donald Trump appointed numerous people to high-level positions who wound up stabbing him in the back.

Odds are, at least one or two of his new appointments will work to undermine his agenda, again, in his second term.

But who will it be?

Who’s the mole?

 

**

 

Best Thing About the Election

 

It’s nice that Trump won, but to me there’s something better:

David beat Goliath.

Despite all odds, the “little people” took on Big Media, Big Pharmacy, movie stars, colleges, corporations, and global “elites” … and kicked their ass.

Democrats claim to be for “marginalized people,” but every institution in the country was against the Trump voters … and the institutions lost.

Big win for The Deplorables … and democracy.

 

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Voice of Shadows

grouchyeditor.com voice

 

A critic’s dilemma:  When reviewing a low-budget movie from a first-time director, is it fair to hold the film to the same standard that you would for a more pedigreed production? Rookie filmmakers should be excused some missteps. On the other hand, the customer pays the same amount for Voice of Shadows as he pays for something from Steven Spielberg.

Pros:  For the most part, the movie looks and sounds professional, and most of the actors are fine. Director Nick Bain creates a suitably creepy atmosphere. The premise — three young people move into a house plagued by evil spirits summoned by an elderly woman — isn’t bad. Also, I liked Guillermo Blanco in the lead.

Cons:  The first two-thirds of the film are a slow burn. Slow burns can be good if the characters are intriguing. Unfortunately, the slowness in Voice is punctuated by a stream of tiresome horror-film clichés. Chairs rock themselves. Lights suddenly go out. Something bad is in the basement. An old book explains the evil spirits. The only thing missing is a cat jumping out of a closet.

Verdict:  Not a bad way to fill 90 minutes on a dark and stormy night. Just don’t expect anything groundbreaking. Release: 2023  Grade: C

 

Would I watch it again?  Not likely.

 

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