We took a week off and, mentally, we are still on vacation. Looking at the news yesterday, it seemed clear that nothing has changed in our absence.
(Correction: things have changed. They’ve gotten worse. They get worse every week.)
All our institutions are corrupt — at least at the top (looking at you, FBI). All our leaders are greedy, cowardly sellouts.
If there’s going to be a civil war, I wish someone would explain how it will work. There is no Mason-Dixon Line this time. It will be blue Chicago vs. red outstate Illinois and blue Los Angeles vs. red outstate California. Neighbor vs. neighbor. That sounds like fun.
After a week’s break from Twitter and other nightmares, the only way to stick our feet back into the “Weekly Review’s” filth-filled waters is to ignore politics and — you guessed it — instead, concentrate on something that matters: the female ass.
Maybe it’s just us, (who am I kidding? “Us” didn’t write this post; “I” did.) butt I’m a little tired of the proliferation of muscular female derrieres in pop culture. Give me a little flab, 1980s style, on a girl’s backside. Like this (click on any picture on this page for a bigger view):
Above, that’s an actress named Stephanie Ann Smith in a movie called Under Lock and Key. No Peloton bike for that ass, but it doesn’t need one.
Or this:
Camille Chen, pictured above, top to bottom, in Californication (also below), Hallow’s End, and Barbershop, has the right idea. A little more flab, a little less muscle. The guy below certainly appreciates Camille’s ass:
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I’ve been watching a mediocre Brazilian sitcom on Netflix because, apparently, that’s what I do these days. Unsuspicious is a slapstick-heavy, unsubtle spoof of murder mysteries. But I noticed an actress-babe named Fernanda Paes Leme (above) and I thought: This is quite the hot 39-year-old actress-babe.
Turns out Leme was in Brazil’s Playboy, circa 2005. And she still looks super-hot today. Without further ado, here she is from Playboy:
Last but not least, here is some regular chick who apparently decided that a wet t-shirt contest wasn’t revealing enough:
She looks to me like the girl next door who had a bit too much to drink. Maybe a lot too much to drink.
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If you don’t recognize the old-time movie star pictured above, there’s a good reason for that. You can see his teeth.
For some reason that escapes me now, I Googled “Rex Harrison” images, and I noticed something peculiar. Out of hundreds of results, this was the only picture I could find in which Rex shows his teeth.
Strange. But now you know.
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Coming tomorrow: a new Tale From the Grouch called “Cold-Hearted Bastard.”
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