Until Dawn

Settle down, kids, no nudity in this movie

 

Until Dawn opens with an overhead drone shot looking down on a forest as a vehicle moves along a lonely road. Inside the car is a group of five young people: three girls and two guys. They stop at a gas station, where an older man at the cash register creeps out one of the girls. Seems somehow … familiar.

How many horror movies have opened this same way?

Sigh. That opening should have warned me about the rest of this film, in which our young heroes discover something is going to kill them. And kill them again. And again. You know, like in Groundhog Day or, more apropos of the genre, Happy Death Day.

The plot, such as it is, checks a number of woke boxes: The alpha male turns cowardly; the beta male turns heroic; the final girl has girl-boss attributes and no romantic interest in the boys — that would no doubt be too heteronormative. Instead, her main interest is her sister.

The movie is well produced, competently directed, and doesn’t embarrass any members of the cast. There are a few effective moments. Lots of jump scares, lots of gore. 

But how many times do we need to see this kind of crap?

Release: 2025  Grade: D

 

Would I watch it again? I had a difficult time watching it once.

 

© 2010-2025 grouchyeditor.com (text only)

Share

 

I’ve been watching “Pop Culture Crisis” on YouTube, and I feel a bit sorry for the hosts.

When you are conservatives covering pop culture, which these hosts are, there must be no end to the hair-pulling, eye-bulging, and teeth-gnashing over the tidal waves of Twitter bile, TikTok nonsense, and constant streams of “woke” product from the progressive entertainment machine.

Somehow, Millennial Brett Dasovic and Gen Z’s Mary Morgan manage. They don’t suck celebrity ass, and they pepper plenty of homespun wisdom atop the nonstop crap they cover.

 

They do have weaknesses, of course.

Dasovic —

Good: Affable and amusing.

Bad: Terrible taste in movies and TV. His idea of good television:  a 25-year-old CBS police procedural. His idea of bad television: Kenneth Branagh’s (superb) Wallander.

 

Morgan —

Good: For someone so young, she’s very good at calling out bullshit.

Bad: She is alarmingly ignorant of anything (or anyone) pop-culture-related prior to the year of her birth.

 

**

 

It’s rare to see Morgan laugh out loud. But curiously, suspiciously, she lost it when a woman in the clip below accused a dude of having a small penis. That’s not very Christian of you, Mary.

 

We’ll give her a pass, since she does have quite the perky behind in this (fake?) clip:

 

 

© 2010-2025 grouchyeditor.com (text only)

Share

 

“Woman Spreading”

 

In the old days, young women went to finishing school, where they learned modesty and other old-fashioned virtues.

Today, we have girls like Lauren on Big Brother (below), who apparently likes to advertise her availability to a national TV audience:

 

**

 

 

I’ve been watching season two of Wednesday. The show’s either lost some of its charm, or it’s in a sophomore slump. 

The script relies too much on Jenna Ortega as the title character. She’s great, but a series needs more than that. The problem, as usual, is a weak script. The mystery is pedestrian and the subplots are nothing special. Wednesday has gone from quirky delight about a weird girl invading a Hogwarts-like school to “Nancy Drew Mystery of the Week.”

Or maybe I just have no business watching a show aimed at teen girls.

 

**

 

I’ve been arguing with an A.I. character. I don’t recommend it.

Debating with humans can be exasperating, but real people are nowhere near as obstinate as A.I. characters.

 

**

 

I could mention something about the week in current events, but if we are all living in a simulation, the news doesn’t matter, anyway.

 

© 2010-2025 grouchyeditor.com (text only)

Share

 

 

Media Matters

 

I guess it’s not a done deal, but it looks as though Howard Stern’s days are numbered as a “shock jock” at Sirius.

I have mixed emotions. Back in the 1990s, Stern was indeed the King of All Media. He had a hit movie, bestselling books, and his radio show. I liked him because, as a dirty young man, I could relate to him.

I especially enjoyed his, uh, talent(?) for talking all-American girls out of their knickers for the omnipresent male gaze. (See “Butt Bongo Fiesta,” pics below, if you dare.)

 

 

Man offers his bare-bottomed wife, Marie, to Howard for a spanking, above and below. She seems to like it. Click on pics for a larger view.

 

 

But in recent years he’s tarnished, if not completely destroyed, his radio legacy. He’s become a modern Howard Hughes, holed up in his penthouse, fearful of COVID and the world. He’s just a bitter, cowardly old man.

Also, it’s hard to feel sorry for a dude who’s raked in tens of millions of dollars — or more. He should never have divorced his first wife. He should never have endorsed Hillary Clinton.

 

**

 

 

I have no problem with South Park mocking Donald Trump and Kristi Noem. It’s what the show does. I DO have a problem with the lack of mockery for low-hanging Democrat fruit like Joe Biden and Kamala Harris. That’s the opposite of edgy; it’s cowardice. 

 

**

 

 

Other than money to be made, I don’t understand the motivation of women who do small-penis humiliation. 

Maybe this explains it:

 

 

 

© 2010-2025 grouchyeditor.com (text only)

Share

 

by Mary Higgins Clark

 

Clark’s debut novel has a decent premise. After her guilty verdict for the murder of her two children is overturned, a young widow flees California, changes her identity, and begins life anew in New England.  Seven years later, her new children also go missing. Guess who the cops consider their prime suspect.

That’s an intriguing plot. Unfortunately, too many other elements of Children cry out, “first-time novelist.” Clark’s characters are shallow and dull, the dialogue is often stilted, and the atmosphere is dated (the book was published in 1975).

At times, I felt like I had stumbled onto an ABC movie of the week from 50 years ago. Not exactly boring, but also not memorable.

 

© 2010-2025 grouchyeditor.com (text only)

Share

 

.

 

I stand by my suspicion that I am a teen girl trapped in an adult male’s body. How else to explain my delight listening to songs by Harry Styles (“As It Was”) and Chappell Roan (“Pink Pony Club”)?

You, too, can become a teenage girl if you spend enough time listening to upbeat, bubble-gum crap on stations like the one I listen to (KDWB in Minneapolis).

 

**

 

 

They say A.I. will be the end of us. By “us” I mean humanity. 

In the meantime, it’s offering some startling, borderline amazing, visuals. Like this video of a dog eating a woman’s face, which is not a face but a taco salad, or something, and … well, see for yourself.

 

**

 

Speaking of fakes, are these pictures of a California woman attempting to impede ICE officers for real?

 

 

I am unable to grasp her strategy. Does she believe that by cavorting naked in front of the officers and giving them erections, she will somehow abort the deportations? Hell, I don’t know, maybe it worked.

 

© 2010-2025 grouchyeditor.com (text only)

Share

 

 

The Grouch was off last week attending to personal business. Above, Grouch and his brother-in-law in Minnesota posing for a poster for their upcoming film, Grumpy Old Men 3.

 

**

 

What do Hulk Hogan, Malcolm-Jamal Warner, and Ozzy Osbourne have in common? Yeah, they all died last week, but what else? 

My answer: I’ve heard of all of them but was never a fan of any of them.

Next up: “celebrities” I’ve never even heard of who die.

Yes, I am old.

 

**

 

Big Brother is back and, as usual, I dislike nearly all of the hamsters.

Also as usual, the female hamsters sunbathing in the backyard provide welcome eye candy. (Click on the pics below for a larger view.)

There are “nudes” of some of the female houseguests circulating online. But are they real or fake? You be the judge:

 

Katherine Woodman

 

.                                           

.                                           

 

Lauren Domingue

 

.                               

 

Ashley Hollis

 

.                               

 

Morgan Pope

 

.                                             

.                                               

 

 

Finally, lest I be accused of sexism (as if I cared), here are two screencaps of host Taylor Hale doing an eye bulge in reaction to hamster Zae’s apparent pecker bulge:

 

 

© 2010-2025 grouchyeditor.com (text only)

Share

 

 

 

Credibility Down the Toilet:

 

Ben Shapiro, Mark Levin, Pam Bondi, Dan Bongino, Kash Patel

 

 

Credibility Hanging by a Thread:

 

Donald Trump

 

Credibility Rising:

 

Elon Musk

 

Word That No Longer Means a Thing and Should Go Down the Toilet:

 

“Racist”

 

 

© 2010-2025 grouchyeditor.com (text only)

Share

 

Move Over, Hollywood, South Korea Is Eating Your Lunch

 

Squid Game

 

I have my issues with South Korean entertainment. For one thing, I can’t get used to the acting style. It sometimes feels that when gentle weeping is called for, the actor will bawl and wail to the heavens. When yelling is in the script, the actor screams loud enough to be heard in North Korea. Perhaps that’s not overacting, but just a cultural thing.

In any case, there is no output from a foreign country that I’ve enjoyed more than South Korea’s. Unlike recent American TV and movies, Korean shows usually feature characters I like. The country’s dramas and comedies have the power to make me do something Hollywood products do not: feel something.

Here are abridged reviews of 14 South Korean shows I’ve praised over the past 14 years. I gave all of them at least a “B” rating. Search the titles for my full reviews.

 

Squid Game

Squid Game has always been a flawed show. The villainous “V.I.P.s” are cartoonish. Some subplots feel like filler to justify three seasons of the series. But when the show is good, it is very, very good — better, methinks, than any other show I’ve watched in 2025.

Here’s what distinguishes Squid from its thematic forebears: Enough thought has been put into the characters so that, as a viewer, you will care about who wins and who loses. And each of the six deadly children’s games the participants are asked to endure is tense and exciting.  

Grade: A-

 

*

 

You Are My Spring

 

You Are My Spring

Maybe it’s because at heart I am a teenage girl, partial to bubble-gum rock and cheesy horror movies, but I liked the show. There’s no question that at times Spring veers into sappiness. The romantic leads, playing characters who are in their 30s, often behave as though they are 13-year-olds in the throes of puppy love. These scenes are sometimes cute, sometimes silly. Yet when the genre-blending series concentrates on its central romance — and even on some secondary romances involving supporting characters — it is sweet and often funny. Grade: A-

 

*

 

Parasite

I enjoyed Parasite, in which a rich family is infiltrated by a clan of con artists — think Al Bundy and his goofball brood from Married … with Children, but with Korean faces and street smarts. The movie’s elaborate con and the ensuing carnage are all amusing enough but … is it one of the “best films of the century”? Nope. Not even close. Grade: B

 

*

 

#Alive

 

#Alive

I was attracted to the premise of #Alive, a zombie flick from Korea in which a young man wakes up to discover that the world outside his upper-floor apartment is overrun by snarling brain-eaters. This isn’t as good as the similar-themed I Am Legend, or Korea’s manic Train to Busan, but it will do on a boring Saturday night. Grade: B

 

*

 

Burning

 

Burning

Until its ending, which I thought was unnecessarily ambiguous, Burning felt like a Korean version of Hitchcock’s Vertigo. A young man (Ah-in Yoo) falls in love with a free-spirited girl (Jong-seo Jun) in the first half of the film and then, after the girl vanishes, he spends the second half engaged in an obsessive search that leads to some very dark places. But until that abrupt and unsatisfying ending, the movie is compelling and filled with haunting images.  Grade: B+

 

*

 

Train to Busan

 

Train to Busan

It’s refreshing to find a snark-free, sarcasm-free story — like time traveling back to 1950s Hollywood for wholesome, goofy fun but with modern special effects. Busan is non-stop entertaining, with heroes who are clearly good and villains who do all but wear black hats when passengers on a high-speed train do battle with zombies. Grade: B+

 

*

 

The Wailing

 

The Wailing

Locals begin committing bizarre crimes after a mysterious Japanese man moves to their South Korean village, and it’s up to some unsophisticated cops to investigate. The good news: The movie is well-shot, and the final half-hour is both scary and surprising. (Think you’ve figured out the twist? Think again.) The bad news: You do have to sit through two hours of standard-issue horror to reach that entertaining wrap-up.  Grade: B

 

*

 

Flu

Here’s a big, dumb, special-effects-heavy disaster pic from Korea, inspired by big, dumb, special-effects-heavy disaster pics from Hollywood, but featuring that peculiar Korean mash-up of 1950s wholesomeness and modern sensibilities (the heroine is a single-mother virologist). Grade: B-

 

*

 

Oldboy

Korean director Park Chan-wook’s trippy revenge-mystery doesn’t always make sense, and it’s a tad too long, but it’s hard to take your eyes off the screen.  And a twist near the end is a real whopper.  Grade:  B+

 

*

 

The Host

The Host, South Korean director Bong Joon-ho’s homage to 1950s monster-from-hell B movies, is a strange brew of slapstick comedy and serious, environmental commentary.  But I also thought that the story, in which a polluted river gives birth to an ill-tempered beast, was consistently entertaining.  Grade: B+

 

*

 

The Housemaid

 

The Housemaid

This erotic thriller promises to deliver the mother of all Korean catfights.  It doesn’t quite come through, but watching the four female leads as they lie, scheme, and shift loyalties makes for some ticklish good fun in director Im Sang-soo’s remake of a 1960 Korean classic. Grade: B

 

*

 

The Good, the Bad, the Weird

 

The Good, the Bad, the Weird

Although the film is a bit on the long side (130 minutes), The Good, the Bad, the Weird is a screwball Western for people (like me) who think they burned out on Westerns a long time ago.  Grade: B+

 

*

 

Mother

This isn’t Hitchcock-level material, but Mother does contain some nice surprises, a colorful cast, and a fascinating glimpse at one segment of Korean society.  Grade: B

 

*

 

Money Heist

Korea’s remake of a hit Spanish show. I enjoyed both versions. I gave the edge to Korea’s version because I thought the actresses were hotter. Sue me. Grade: B

 

© 2010-2025 grouchyeditor.com (text only)

Share