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A Penny for Your Thoughts

 

I had misgivings about Showtime’s Penny Dreadful when it premiered earlier this year.  The eight-part miniseries was promoted as a horror mash-up of Frankenstein, The Picture of Dorian Gray, and Dracula, and that kind of thing reeks of gimmick.

The first episode did little to allay my doubts.  Although the setting, the fog-shrouded streets of 1891 London, was suitably atmospheric, and the actors, especially Timothy Dalton and Eva Green, were suitably grave, the whole episode played out like one tedious set-up for one clichéd vampire attack.

But then I watched the rest of the series.   And now I think that Penny Dreadful is one of the best shows of the year.

 

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The plot:   Mysterious explorer Sir Malcolm Murray (Dalton) enlists the aid of the even more mysterious Vanessa Ives (Green), American sharpshooter Ethan Chandler (Josh Hartnett), and Victor Frankenstein (Harry Treadaway) to rescue his daughter from the clutches of … well, something evil.

 

More thoughts:

  • Creator John Logan has love and respect for Victorian horror literature – and it shows.  He doesn’t so much exploit the sagas of Frankenstein, Dracula, and Dorian Gray as he reinvigorates them, skillfully weaving the tales together.  Logan knows that the old stories were about more than monsters; they were about human frailty and, perhaps above all, sadness.
  • The acting is uniformly good, but whoa … Eva Green is a sensation.  As the lone female in the quartet of vampire hunters, Green absolutely commands attention, whether she’s quietly appraising another character or in the throes of demonic possession.  I am still recovering from her performance in episode two.
  • The show’s strength is atmosphere, but the tone is so relentlessly grim that at times the series is a bit of an endurance test.  Best not to binge-watch Penny Dreadful; I’d recommend watching just one or two episodes per week.  You know, kind of like we used to do.
  • If I was asked to summarize season one in just two words, those words would be “loving care.”  The attention paid to detail – 19th-century settings and costumes, the musical score, poetic dialogue – is impressive.

 

The more sensational, violent scenes, such as the aforementioned vampire attack, are actually a bit of a letdown.  Logan and company are more interested in exploring the deeper themes introduced by Stoker, Shelley and Wilde, and rightfully so.  That said, there is no shortage of straight-up horror for straight-up horror lovers.    Grade:  A-

 

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Creator:  John Logan   Cast:  Timothy Dalton, Eva Green, Josh Hartnett, Reeve Carney, Rory Kinnear, Billie Piper, Danny Sapani, Simon Russell Beale, Helen McCrory  Premiere:  2014 

 

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Watch Trailers and Clips (click here)

 

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Protocol1

 

In a surprising break from tradition, the White House this week announced that First Daughters Sasha and Malia Obama will oversee the Office of Diplomatic Protocol.  The announcement comes just days after the girls charmed members of the media and the public at the presidential turkey pardon (below).

 

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 Sasha, left, and Malia add sparkle to the president’s turkey “pardon”

 

Reached for comment on Saturday, Malia raised an eyebrow at a reporter and said, “As if.”  Sister Sasha was overheard snorting in the background.

 

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 Insiders say the Obama girls inherited their bubbly optimism from mother and grandmother

 

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 Sasha and Malia enjoying their time in the spotlight

 

First Family watchers say that Sasha, especially, displays infectious enthusiasm

 

*****

 

Alba

 Jessica Alba

 

Hollywood actress Jessica Alba shocked fans this week when she posted this selfie on Twitter.  Alba told followers she “got a chemical peel to look more sexier.”

 

*****

 

Catch

 

Not sure if this is The Huffington Post trying to make a funny, or if they are simply still in need of a proofreader.

 

*****

 

The only person in America who’s happy about events in Ferguson — because it takes the media spotlight off of him:

 

Bill

 

*****

 

Quote of the Week:

 

“He asked to do things I wasn’t going to do.  He is ugly, old and disgusting.  I tied him up.  I took his money and left.  He was starting to creep me out.” – 17-year-old Shaina Foster, who along with her twin sister Shalaine tied up and robbed 84-year-old Paul Aronson during a “date.”

 

*****

 

Curry2

 

Didn’t the same thing happen to her with Matt Lauer on The Today Show?

 

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*****

 

Gruber                HansGruber

                     Jonathan Gruber                                                                        Hans Gruber

 

We’ve met the most villainous Gruber since Die Hard.  At least Hans wasn’t stupid.

 

*****

 

Illegal immigration.  Bill Cosby.  The weather.

I thought I might write about one or more of those subjects this week.

I decided that no, I would not do that.  Instead, this feels like an excellent week to emulate the ostrich:

 

Sand

 

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Zone

 

I feel like we’re living in that old Twilight Zone episode called “The Midnight Sun.” In the show, New York residents swelter as the Earth falls into the Sun.  Not to worry – it’s only a dream.  But wait … in reality, the Earth is hurtling away from the Sun, and everyone will freeze.

In Minnesota, we froze our buns off last winter.  This winter is threatening to be worse.  And yet scientists tell us that we are experiencing global warming.  Where’s Rod Serling when you need him?

 

*****

 

I had a routine check-up this week, and at one point my doctor began to pull on the rubber gloves.  He said he “would be happy” to conduct a rectal exam.

On my way out of the clinic, I stopped at the nurses’ desk and told them about my doctor’s comment and how I failed to see how a rectal exam could make anyone “happy.”  Is this why young people go to medical school?

 

*****

 

BBCGame

 

TV Update

 

BBC America’s The Game, about spies fighting the Cold War in 1970s Britain, has a been-there-done-that feel about it, and the hero (Tom Hughes) looks like a 12-year-old, but it’s a fairly engrossing thriller.    Grade:  B

Starz continues its crusade to stop being Starz by airing its second quality series (the other is Outlander) with The Missing.  It’s another missing-child drama, but a smart script, good acting, and its location (set in France, filmed in Belgium) make it feel fresh.    Grade:  B+

 

Starz

 

*****

 

Race in America

 

There is good news and good news.

The good news for black Americans is that the country proved – twice – that it was willing to elect an African-American president.

The good news for white Americans is that Obama seems hell-bent on proving that black presidents can be just as bad as white presidents.

 

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SnyderJones

Jerry Jones, owner of the Dallas Tits, congratulates Washington owner Dan Snyder

 

Use

 

*****

 

I’ve been reading about “vocal fry,” something apparently inspired by Kim Kardashian in which the female voice trails off into a sort of whine/growl at the end of sentences.  You know who else has “vocal fry”?  Bill O’Reilly.

 

*****

 

Indian

 

 

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Snowpiercer

Snow

 

It’s the future (again), and what’s left of mankind is crammed into a high-speed train that endlessly circles the frozen Earth.  Will the have-nots in the back of the train revolt and seek revenge on the elite at the front?  Snowpiercer suffers badly from comic-book-movie disease:  It takes itself much, much too seriously.  The dialogue is trite and the character development nonexistent, yet the movie wants us to care about the fate of its cardboard characters.  There are, however, some cool-looking sets aboard the train.  Release:  2013  Grade:  B

 

*****

 

Frozen

Frozen

 

It’s a cynical world, but you wouldn’t know it from watching Disney’s charming Frozen.  What’s not to like?  For starters, Kristen Bell brings spunk and humor to the heroine, a determined princess named Anna.  The animation is startlingly good and the songs are … satisfactory.  There are some lapses of logic in the story (loosely based on Hans Christian Andersen’s “The Snow Queen”), but hey, this is a fairy tale and double-hey, isn’t this movie supposed to be for kids?  Release:  2013  Grade:  B+

 

*****

 

Nebraska

Nebraska

 

The rubes who populate Nebraska are a bit stereotyped, but it’s a pleasure to watch 76-year-old Bruce Dern and Will Forte as a father and son making a cross-country trip to claim what Dad thinks is a sweepstakes prize.  This isn’t director Alexander Payne’s best work, but his trademark gentle humor is on full display, and so is the Midwest – for better or worse.  Release:  2013   Grade:  B

 

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Clown

 

American Horror Story lost me last year with its Sabrina the Teenage Witch storyline, but I’m back this season for the Freak Show.  This is a wildly imaginative show – not always coherent, but wildly imaginative.

 

*****

 

Catcall

 

OK, maybe Rush Limbaugh is the scourge of humanity, but funny is funny, and I give him credit for this line regarding the actress who was catcalled while walking the streets of New York:  “I love the women’s movement, especially when walking behind it.”

 

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On the other hand, some people are defending the boorish behavior of those catcalling dudes, claiming that many of their comments were simply polite greetings.  Hogwash.  How many of these guys would issue “polite greetings” to a middle-aged man walking down the street, or an elderly woman?  Nah … every one of those comments was a come-on.

 

Catcall2

 

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Crawl1

 

It’s a tough call on who ranks lower on the scumbag scale, celebrity paparazzi or freelance photographers who film the aftermath of crime scenes.  My vote would go for the latter.  Paparazzi spend their time annoying famous people, but the ghouls who take video of gory accidents have the potential to do more serious damage.

In Nightcrawler, Jake Gyllenhaal plays one of those videographers, and he plays it well.  Louis Bloom is a petty thief who witnesses a car accident and then realizes that he’s stumbled across his own version of the American Dream.  Shallow but smart, Bloom has absorbed the Dream’s work ethic and ambition, but not its soul.  When he meets a local news director (Rene Russo) who shares his disdain for professional ethics, it’s the beginning of a not-so-beautiful relationship.

Nightcrawler aspires to do to local news what Network did to national news, skewering the ratings-are-everything mentality, but mostly this is a character study of a man with no character.  Although Gyllenhaal’s performance is memorable, he’s playing a one-note role.  We see how Bloom gets into the ambulance-chasing racket, and we see how he thrives.  But the movie doesn’t really take off until Bloom’s ambition takes him a step too far – why should he wait for great footage when he can orchestrate it himself?

Dan Gilroy wrote and directed the film.  His direction is good but not great, his script is good but not great, and Nightcrawler is good, but not quite great.        Grade:  B+

 

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Director:  Dan Gilroy  Cast:  Jake Gyllenhaal, Rene Russo, Riz Ahmed, Bill Paxton, Ann Cusack, Sharon Tay, Leah Fredkin  Release:  2014

 

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Watch Trailers and Clips (click here)

 

 

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by Janet Evanovich

Takedown

 

There is no point in my writing yet another review of yet another Stephanie Plum novel.  Plum creator Evanovich has been phoning in series entries for years now, and so I will phone in this review.  For more, you can go here.  Or here.  Or here.

 

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Dash1

 

*****

 

Funny

 

The Huffington Post giggled over a typo in The New York Times.

 

I giggled over typos in The Huffington Post:

 

Huff1Huff2

Huff3Huff4

Huff5

 

*****

 

Logo

 

Always on the lookout for the best and brightest journalists and political pundits, Fox News has been showcasing its latest find, the stimulating actress Stacey Dash.

Dash has been showing up everywhere on Fox, including appearances on Outnumbered, Red Eye and The O’Reilly Factor.  

Bill O’Reilly conducted a hard-hitting interview in which we learned that Dash had a difficult childhood.  Rumor has it that Dash might replace veteran pundit Charles Krauthammer as O’Reilly’s go-to-gal on issues of concern to conservatives.

 

Billo

 

Dash, best known for her riveting performance in the soft-core movie Illegal in Blue, is also known for pictures.

 

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Outnumber

Dash lends her expertise to the hosts of Outnumbered

 

Blue

Dash’s pop-up, er, breakout performance in Illegal in Blue

 

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Dash4

 

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