Disturbia1

 

Yeah, I know.  Shia LaBeouf is no James Stewart, Sarah Roemer is no Grace Kelly, and director D.J. Caruso will never be mistaken for Alfred Hitchcock.  But I like their movie Disturbia, anyway.

In this 2007 reboot of Hitchcock’s Rear Window, LaBeouf stars as Kale, a high school senior who, following the tragic death of his father, acts out in such an aggressive manner that he is sentenced to house arrest, confined to his messy bedroom, his electronic toys – and the dubious pleasure of spying on his suburban neighbors.  One of those neighbors turns out to be a serial killer, but will anyone believe bad boy Kale’s story?

Yes, this tale was told much better in Rear Window, but if you don’t go into Disturbia expecting “instant classic,” you will have a voyeuristic good time.  That’s because Caruso does a fine job blending John Hughes-inspired teen comedy with Hitchcock-style suspense.

 

Disturbia2

 

The movie also works because LaBeouf – think what you will of his off-camera exploits – has charisma out the caboose.  Caruso said that in casting his young star, he was seeking an actor “who guys would really like and respond to, because he wasn’t going to be such a pretty boy.”  Mission accomplished.  I can’t imagine Robert Pattinson carrying this film.

LaBeouf has some solid support.  David Morse, as menacing neighbor Mr. Turner, is good enough to make you forget Window’s murderous Raymond Burr.  Roemer, although no model of sophistication, a la Kelly, would make any teen boy hyperventilate (not to mention, ahem, some older males).

But Disturbia is LaBeouf’s movie.  His Kale is troubled, intense, insecure, and sometimes annoying.  He is also compulsively watchable.  Hell, I even liked his messy bedroom.         Grade:  B

 

Disturbia3

 

Director:  D.J. Caruso   Cast:  Shia LaBeouf, Sarah Roemer, Carrie-Anne Moss, David Morse, Aaron Yoo, Jose Pablo Cantillo, Matt Craven, Viola Davis   Release:  2007

 

Disturbia4          Disturbia5

 

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Disturbia6

 

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by Spencer Quinn

DogOnIt

                                                                   

Some people never seem to learn – especially me.  I’ve been burned before by Stephen King book recommendations, but I didn’t let that stop me from suckering in after reading this King description of Dog on It:  “Yeah, it’s cute, but not too.  There’s a real mystery here, and great suspense as well.” 

This detective story narrated by a dog is cute alright – way cute, and I say that even though I like dogs.  As for the alleged “mystery” and “great suspense,” well, I suppose so, if you are still into the Hardy Boys or Nancy Drew.  Dog on It is the first book in a series about the crime-fighting duo of Chet (the dog) and Bernie (the human), and it’s fitfully amusing, but that’s all.

 

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Bachmann

 

Tom Petty asked Michele Bachmann to stop using his song, “American Girl,” on the campaign trail.  Petty also requested that George Bush stop using Petty music during a Bush campaign.  Must be a tough job for whoever selects Republican campaign music, because unless you are into country, most popular music is created by liberals.

 

*****

 

Hansen

 

A hidden camera caught Chris Hansen cheating on his wife.  Good.  I’m all for busting child molesters, but to me Hansen’s To Catch a Predator reeks of illegal entrapment.

 

*****

 

KardAss1

 

I’m tired of Kim Kardashian and her worthless family.  I mention Her Assness because as I write this, she and her dumb-jock boyfriend are just a few miles from me, attending a baseball game at Target Field, and I think I just heard thunder.  If I am wrong about that and the sound is instead Kim experiencing flatulence, then these could be the last words I ever type.

 

KardAss3    KardAss4

 

KardAss2      KardAss5

 

 

*****

 

Dickipedia — an amusing site.  It seems to be an equal-opportunity abuser.

 

Dickipedia 

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Trip1

The critics seem to love this road comedy – so why didn’t I?  There was only one thing I could do:  I had to make The Trip twice.

On my first viewing, I thought the film’s British humor might have whizzed past me because comedy does not always travel well.  Or maybe I simply had trouble deciphering the actors’ heavy accents.  For whatever reason, I was not particularly taken with this two-hour expansion of a popular English television series.

Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon play fictionalized versions of themselves, two moderately successful actors.  Coogan is the insecure playboy, and Brydon is the contented family man.   After his latest girlfriend splits, Coogan invites sort-of pal Brydon to join him on an excursion to the north of England, expenses paid by a magazine for which Coogan, hopefully, will write an article about the culinary delights found at country inns.

The two aging performers do much of their communicating – too much of it – through celebrity impersonations.  Amusing at first, this kind of repartee can grow tiresome.  Somewhere after the fifth or sixth such scene, I vowed never again to watch a Michael Caine movie.

But the critics loved this film.  So I watched it a second time and — surprise! —  it seemed much better.  The constant barrage of movie-star mimicry became less irksome.  I began to soak in the beautiful northern England landscapes, and to salivate at the sight of golden scallops soaked in butter.

The Trip grew on me mostly because Coogan and Brydon grew on me.  Much of the screenplay’s wit stems from the way these two decidedly heterosexual males interact.  They can discuss “soft” topics like Coleridge’s poetry and gourmet dining only if they also come with a side of competition, a dash of homophobia, and a bit more competition.

But there was still too much yakking, even on my second viewing.  The Trip is at its best when it stops long enough for some introspection – primarily by Coogan, who is confronted with his past (a woman with whom he once had a one-night stand – or so he thinks), his present (is Brydon’s dull-yet-happy home life a better way to live?) and his future (an old bore who ensnares him on a rock-climbing expedition; is it Coogan’s destiny to wind up like this old coot?).

In the end, I enjoyed The Trip and I recommend it.  I just hope you don’t have to watch it twice.      Grade:  B

 

Trip2

 

Director:  Michael Winterbottom  Cast:  Steve Coogan, Rob Brydon, Claire Keelan, Margo Stilley, Rebecca Johnson, Dolya Gavanski, Kerry Shale  Release:  2011

 

Trip3        Trip4

 

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Sisters1

 

There are three good reasons to check out Brian De Palma’s 1973 thriller, Sisters.  You are rewarded with 1) the fun of spotting allusions to Alfred Hitchcock movies;  2) a killer performance by Margot Kidder; and  3) one knock-your-socks-off murder – you can pretty much see it coming, but when it does, it punches you in the gut, anyway.

Kidder is all fluttery innocence as Danielle, a French-Canadian model/actress who recently, uh, parted ways with her twin sister, Dominique.  Or so it seems.  When Danielle’s apparently jealous ex-husband intrudes on her date with a handsome black acquaintance, things turn nasty.  A nosy neighbor (Jennifer Salt) sees a murder through Danielle’s apartment window.  Or does she?

De Palma has great fun weaving elements of Psycho, Rear Window, and even North by Northwest into the murder and subsequent investigation.  The first thing you notice when the credits begin for Sisters is the dramatic musical score by legendary Hitchcock collaborator Bernard Herrmann.  Nobody did “disturbing music” better than Herrmann (he came up with the shrieking strings in Psycho), and his contribution to the mayhem in Sisters is a reminder of his value to Hitchcock.

Sisters’s low budget does come with a few drawbacks.  Some of the acting is less than stellar, some of the dialogue is less than sharp, and the final 15 minutes of the film, although visually engrossing, is narratively weak.  De Palma’s 38-year-old script also includes some rather dubious psychology regarding the nature of Siamese twins.  But, hey – get ready to be punched in the gut.          Grade:  B

 

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Director:  Brian De Palma  Cast:  Margot Kidder, Jennifer Salt, Charles Durning, William Finley, Lisle Wilson, Barnard Hughes, Mary Davenport, Dolph Sweet, Olympia Dukakis  Release:  1973

 

Sisters3       Sisters4

Sisters5       Sisters6

 

                                       Watch the Trailer (click here)

 

Sisters7

 

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Stagecoach

 

“One of the great American films, and a landmark in the maturing of the Western.” “Here … is a movie of the grand old school, a genuine rib-thumper and a beautiful sight to see.”

Thus wrote Leonard Maltin and the New York Times, raving about John Ford’s Stagecoach.  To me, the movie is just another old John Wayne flick.  But damn, who am I to argue with Maltin and the New York Times?  Watch it for free by clicking here.

 

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Ipod

 

The anti-smoker police are at it again, using their Big Brother bully pulpit to place revolting pictures on cigarette packages.  Fine.  I think I have a small but potentially effective way to fight back.

First, I recommend that all smokers purchase a good old-fashioned cigarette case, like the iPod model pictured above.  Second, every time you empty out one of these new, anti-constitutional packages (free speech, anyone?), leave it somewhere very public, such as on a library shelf, a restaurant table, or a park bench. 

My hunch is that if enough mothers realize that little Johnny and Susie are being exposed to the repulsive illustrations on empty packages, they will react the same way they would if the object in question was a discarded Playboy magazine — with anger.  Quite possibly, these furious mothers will make the politicians back down.

 

*****

 

Roger1

 

Roger Ebert caught hell for his possibly insensitive, definitely ill-timed Twitter post about the death of Jackass star Ryan Dunn.  I thought that Ebert caved to public pressure, and so I called him out on his blog.  Much to my surprise, the Big Man actually replied to my lecture:

 

Roger2

 

*****

 

Louie3

 

Summertime television used to suck.  Not anymore.  The second season of Louie premiered the other night.  It was just a so-so episode, but if last year was any indication, there should be more flashes of comic brilliance on this FX series.  The second season of The Big C premieres Monday on Showtime.  Laura Linney, as a soccer mom with cancer, is a sight to behold in this comedy-drama.  And on July 13 the final year of Rescue Me kicks off, also on FX.  Last year was a sub-par season for this once-great Denis Leary series.  Let’s hope it goes out with a bang.

 

Linney

 

 

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    by Shirley MacLaine

                                                 Limb                                               

 

It’s tough to critique a book like this because, as a reviewer, you can’t really be “objective.”  You must commit yourself:  Do you buy into the author’s theories of astral planes, UFOs, and reincarnation?  Or do you think it’s a bunch of superstitious nonsense?  If you pooh-pooh the material, you can be accused of being closed-minded.  If you agree with the author’s claims, then you might be as loopy as she is. I happen to think there is something to this “higher power” business.

Out on a Limb is structured in two parts:  Part of the book details movie star MacLaine’s love affair with a married politician; the second and larger portion of the memoir depicts her journeys around the world, meeting with like-minded people in search of deeper meanings to life.  The love affair grows tiresome to follow, but MacLaine’s discoveries about past lives, karma, and yes, UFOs, are sometimes fascinating, sometimes annoying.

Did she convert me to her beliefs?  Not entirely.  But I won’t dismiss her concepts as groundless, either.  As a friend of MacLaine’s says of her spiritual quest, “It can drive a guy nuts, but it made me look deeper, too.”

 

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Hour1

 

The Double Hour falls squarely into my favorite genre, the romantic suspense film.  Alfred Hitchcock, of course, was the master of this type of movie, but now and then someone else produces a good one.  The Double Hour, from Italian director Giuseppe Capotondi, is more typical of what fans of this genre usually get:  a nice try, but no threat to Hitchcock.

I’m going to summarize the plot, but keep in mind that everything I describe might or might not be true.  (Yes, it’s that kind of movie.)  A hotel maid (Kseniya Rappoport) meets a handsome ex-cop (Filippo Timi) at a speed-dating event.  They seem to hit it off, but quickly find themselves in the middle of an art heist in which someone is shot.  But is the maid who she says she is?  Is the ex-cop who he claims to be?

I can’t say more about the plot without either lying or revealing too much.  The problem with The Double Hour is that when you have a story this convoluted – with twists and turns pummeling the audience – your movie needs a lead character or two who are well-grounded, someone the audience can cling to when things get loopy.  Alas, the two lovers are both rather cold, distant characters, and the chemistry between them is underwhelming.  Russian actress Rappoport, especially, is attractive but doesn’t display much range.

I’m not sure that director Capotondi plays entirely fair with the audience.  There’s a fine line between “Oh, I get it now” and “Hey, that’s cheating!”  Still, if you enjoy this kind of movie, like I do, and if you are into solving puzzles, The Double Hour will keep you guessing.  But it’s no Vertigo.       Grade:  B-

 

Hour2

 

Director:  Giuseppe Capotondi   Cast:  Kseniya Rappoport, Filippo Timi, Antonia Truppo, Gaetano Bruno, Fausto Russo Alesi, Michele Di Mauro, Lorenzo Gioielli, Lidia Vitale   Release:  2009

 

Hour3         Hour4

Hour5         Hour6

 

                                     Watch Trailers and Clips (click here)

 

Hour7

 

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