Monthly Archives: October 2011

Sea1

 

Great settings can compensate for a multitude of movie sins — bad acting, sloppy direction, ridiculous plots.  I will find myself watching a piece of junk like Anaconda, or Deep Blue Sea, a second time (or a third time) simply to soak in the cool visuals.  This is why, I suspect, they invented the mute button.

Without further ado, and to paraphrase Julie Andrews, these are a few of my favorite sets:

 

Alien1

 

The spaceship in Alien.  A haunted house in outer space — what more can a movie fan ask for?

 

Alien2

Alien3

 

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Swiss1

 

The tree house in Swiss Family Robinson.  If possible, I’d swap out the organ for an entertainment center, but otherwise we are all set.

 

Swiss2

 

**

 

Overlook2         Overlook1

 

The Overlook Hotel in The Shining.  Stephen King did not approve of Kubrick’s movie, but who needs Stephen King when you’ve got a walk-in freezer full of ice cream?

 

**

 

Thing1

 

The Antarctic research center in The Thing.  I’d prefer to be stranded with six Hooters girls, rather than a bunch of unshaven scientists, but you can’t have everything.

 

Thing2

 

**

 

Anaconda

 

The ramshackle boat in Anaconda.  This is a great example of a setting that looks like fun from the comfort of your Barcalounger.  In reality, I’d probably want the snake to eat me rather than spend five minutes on a boat like this.

 

**

 

Sea2

 

The oceanic research lab in Deep Blue Sea.  I must have a thing for isolated research labs.  (Also pictured at top.)

 

Sea3

 

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Name1

 

The monastery in The Name of the Rose.  Why is it that places that would be hell to actually live in often look so inviting on the screen?

 

Name2

Name3

 

**

 

 

Hogwarts.  I don’t care how old you are — we all want to live at Hogwarts.

 

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CottageA

Halloween’s around the corner, and there are two decent horror-comedies you can check out:  Tucker & Dale vs. Evil (in theaters) and The Cottage (right here).  Neither film is a masterpiece, but they both have their moments.  Click here to see Andy Serkis as a bumbling kidnapper on the run from a deranged farmer in The Cottage, or go here to read my review of it.

 

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Congress

 

Thursday’s “breaking news” by The Onion was inspired satire.  Here is an excerpt:

 

Onion

 

Too bad the media is populated with humorless halfwits.  Conservative blogger Michelle Malkin whined that “the satirists at The Onion took things too far.”  Malkin was probably taken in by the spoof and is now bitter about revealing her own naivete.  I’m not sure which is worse, being duped by such obvious tomfoolery or being afflicted with terminal crabbiness.  Incredibly, the panelists on Fox’s Red Eye debated whether or not the story was funny.  Isn’t Red Eye supposed to be a humor show?

 

*****

 

Wheel   Rogen

 

The two most annoying laughs on television:  a woman in a Wheel of Fortune commercial, and actor Seth Rogen on any talk show.  If you are a glutton for punishment, you may listen to them both and decide which is more unbearable.  Click here for the braying donkey (Rogen) on David Letterman; click here for the cackling hyena in the Wheel of Fortune ad.

 

*****

 

Bartman

 

ESPN’s documentary Catching Hell chronicles the mob mentality that victimized poor Steve Bartman (above) during the 2003 baseball playoffs.  Bartman’s grab for a foul ball was deemed “fan interference” by Chicago Cubs fans, who then blamed the team’s ensuing loss on Bartman.  After watching all of the crap these idiots put Bartman through,  I am hoping that the Cubs never get to a World Series, simply because their “fans” don’t deserve one.

 

*****

 

K-PAX Premiere

 

Political Scoop of the Week:

“My wife was betrothed to him.” — Larry King to Joy Behar, somehow garbling his description of the childhood relationship between his wife and Republican presidential candidate Jon Huntsman

 

*****

 

Scarlett Johansson wrote a Huffington Post blog about the plight of Kenyans.  I left a comment on the blog, praising her (sincerely) for drawing attention to a good cause, and praising her (sincerely) for taking nude pictures of herself that are now all over the Internet.

My comment was deleted for violating terms of the Web site.  Ridiculous.

 

*****

 

Eva Longoria never fails to amaze me.  Not only is she a talented actress, but her sporting exploits are legendary.  Below are pictures of Eva excelling at volleyball and at baseball.  Longoria recently propelled Tampa Bay into baseball’s playoffs by clouting a game-winning home run.

 

Eva1     Evan

 

Eva2

 

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